The Lord never says everything to everyone. Jesus did so when He explained everything to His disciples when they were alone and spoke to the others in parables. Even from His disciples He took apart Peter, Jacob and John when He wanted to show them something He didn’t want to show to other Apostles.
Paul also writes about this, that “we preach wisdom among the mature”, not to all, because “you are carnal yet, we can’t speak these things to you”.
“But solid food belongs to those who are full of age, that is, those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil” (Hebr.5:14) – That is, they have experience that gives them the discernment. Those people, who have loved the light not through sensuality and smooth journey, but through having had their battle and victory in it.
Where to seek first love?
“To the angel of the church of Ephesus write, ‘These things says He who holds the seven stars in His right hand, who walks in the midst of the seven golden lampstands” – these are seven types of churches. These are not denominations. Just as there are human races in the human world, so there types of churches in God’s sight, which are present in different confessions, which Angels don’t even look at, that’s all emptiness. The question is whether this is the church or not. Not even the church as a unit, but these people in white clothes here and there and all over – that is the church.
““I know your works, your labor, your patience, and that you cannot ear those who are evil. And you have tested those who say they are apostles and are not, and have found them liars; and you have persevered and have patience, and have labored for My name’s sake and have not become weary. Nevertheless I have this against you, that you have left your first love. Remember therefore from where you have fallen; repent and do the first works, or else I will come to you quickly and remove your lampstand from its place—unless you repent. But this you have, that you hate the deeds of the Nicolaitans, which I also hate. He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches. To him who overcomes I will give to eat from the tree of life, which is in the midst of the Paradise of God.” (Rev.2:1-7)
I want to ask myself and each one of us – do you have the first love?
You may have the right face expression, but speak honestly – do you live in the first love or not? If you were to see yourself as a tree, what kind of tree would you draw – a huge powerful cedar fruitful upon the mountain top or shabby and torn with no fruit? What are you doing then with all this? Do you have the first love?
The Lord says here that He holds your star in His hand. He knows all your works, and here is both judgment and mercy. He knows bad things about you – I know your works – for some it sounds like a sentence. And He certainly hasn’t forgotten what you’ve done for Him.
But all this labor, patience, and righteous discernment, that you have tested those who say they are apostles and are not, and have found them liars – all these are nothing, because the major thing is missing. These things can’t replace the major thing, which is called First Love.
Often times blind people boast in works, labor, patience, some battle victories, but the Lord says “I know you, you have left your first love”.
He says, “Remember, we used to have something with you, which you manifested towards Me, what you don’t manifest now”. Remember your way, where you were higher that you are now, remember what you had with Me… and repent.
I want to note this is not a sermon – this is the Lord speaking. Wake up, this is the Lord speaking.
And He says, now do the works, do the works of love. It is actually dangerous for the lampstand of our life to live without first love. He says, if we don’t do what He says, He will remove our lampstand. Imagine, your lampstand is put out – I’ve met people who are unable to rise anymore. You tell him, come on, let’s go! But he can’t because his inner core is broken. He can’t anymore. Not speaking of missions, he can’t come for prayer – so deep into his own darkness, his own theology. He may be right in his own eyes, but he doesn’t love the people in church, has no desire to identify with them.
I’ve been saying to my brothers and sisters lately that for them I commit myself, I’ve shared my life with them, my whole life is with them. And I have another goal to attain – if I am joined with them, I have to be ready to die for them, this is my purpose. This is what the Lord said, “For them I sanctify Myself”.
You can’t be a good Christian and have strong relationship with the Lord if among the saints you have no people, with whom you’ve connected your life and are ready do share and give it.
The Lord is known through crucifixion and resurrection. You have not yet been crucified with Him. You come to church so great and think your position is one of a spiritual person? No. You won’t give your life for brothers and sisters in extreme situations, because now you are not giving it for them.
It is very dangerous to live without first love, because you are getting spoiled, sour, rusted, rotten in your own theology. You are not being transformed but are getting away from the image, because only together saints can comprehend what depth, height, width and length are.
The one who overcomes is the one who catches up.
Where to seek first love? I remember the time when I didn’t know what was happening to me, but I simply had no admiration. Find a way where you will always live in admiration. If we don’t live in delight with God, we have lost our love. Life with God is life in admiration, life in delight. You cannot see the Lord and not admire him. When delight leaves our lives our faith becomes boring, we become boring people, our church is boring, who wants to go there… It means we have abandoned the way of life.
When I felt that I went out in the streets and started giving out expensive clothes and ties to homeless people. I knew they would exchange it all for drinks, but I wanted to get free myself. Is this love? I didn’t get any better after this.
Then God gave a revelation – “you have left first love”. What about all those deeds? – Well, nothing of that works. Come on, you get your walking staff, a bag behind your back and set off on a journey in search of first love. Seek! Where? How? – I don’t know. Go and do something about this.
And today I am calling you, that we all may set off from our “dens” or “houses” in search of first love. If you don’t find it, you will lose it forever. Do we need a sickness, a loss in our house so that something fries us up and we begin seeking the Lord. Do we need a catastrophe in the country to begin to seek God?
Why not get bold enough to seek him now, when nothing has happened yet, make a decision now, to set off, quietly but faithfully in search of love.
Some say you have to seek it in the past. Some say, “I used to be zealous, I need to return to this” – you will never return. You know why? – Because it is not there. First love is not in the past. Do not return – you will not find it there. You know why – Firstly, she isn’t an infant anymore. She has changed. She has reached her maturity. As it is written the little sister is still young, she is not ready for marriage yet.
But she says “ I am a wall and my breasts like towers” – this first love lives not in the past, but in the future.
Therefore, do not look back, there’s just your past there. There is no first love back there. Turn forth, she is there. I am giving you are guide now. Therefore, do not look back, but go forth.
You know how the breaking happened. It says, “you have left”. But it’s not that you were leading here by the hand as a commander, then she got lost and now you have to find her, help and wash. No. But it was she who was leading and inspiring you, and you got lost behind.
So what you have to do is turn forth and start running after her, because she is far ahead, and you left her, lost her hand, remained in your spot, sat down and started filling your mouth and do repairs around. But she keeps going forth, because there are those who love her.
It is you who have declined into other interests and passions from her. And it is you who betrayed her, she never did it.
Therefore, run after the chariots! Who, where? Well, there are the strong ones who are running after her – find them. And don’t connect in communities of bad temper – complainers, criticizing experts. People of light have no time to criticize others, they don’t “cook” in gossip – this is disgusting and rotten kind of food, and secondly, they have no time. Find such ones, run after the chariots of the strong ones among God’s people. Connect with people who either have first love or passionately seek it.
“I went down to the garden of nuts to see the verdure of the valley, to see whether the vine had budded and the pomegranates had bloomed”. (Song of songs 6:11) – Nuts, verdure, vine and pomegranates – these are of the field of first love.
“Before I was aware, my desire had brought me into the area of the princes of my people”(6:12)
I am not aware either, why I can’t do, why I am drawn so much. I remember those ministers, with whom I fell in love, they were baptized with fire, people who proved their faithfulness to the Lord at a death threat. There love was as if some expensive aged infused drink, precious myrrh, conscious and aged, of very high quality. It must have been mixed with wisdom and spirituality.
The one who overcomes is the one who catches up with and attains it again, and then, as the Lord promises it, you will get an access to the tree of life.
Yes, you have to get an access to it. The Lord stationed the cherubim there and the sward with the flashing blade which turned around in every direction – no chance to get through. Many tried, scientists, poets, artists – but no, only those whom the Lord has chosen.
So the one who overcomes. I used to think that Jesus would feed me from the tree of life, as a little one. But now I think that the one who’s overcome goes to the tree himself and chooses fruit for himself, picks them and eats them. When the Lord opens an access to the tree of life, you pick fruit yourself. He says: “To him who overcomes I will grant to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God.” (Rev.2:7)
Therefore, don’t return, don’t look back, don’t try to change the past, but catch up forth and take care of the future. Don’t waste time to rub things in the past or fulfill wrong vows – move forward! Because first love is ahead of you, you lost her ahead. Keep running! They will try to stop you – eat here, sleep there, stay with us – no! I have no time, I am so busy seeking! Who? What or whom have you lost? It is night outside, dangers… But for me it is more dangerous to stay with you.
Attain New First Love, not the old one, which was an infant. She has grown mature and ready for marriage. This first love you go after.